Parenting 101 Part II.

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1 Parenting 101 Part II

2 How to Discipline Your Children? 如何管教/教養你的孩子？
Pix taken from: How to Disciple Your Children? 如何把你的孩子當「門徒」？ (by Walter Henrichsen)

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4 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 Men are created to be Free

5 Large Boundary with A LOT of Freedom
- Guidelines on what NOT to do - Reason & Consequence when you go outside of the boundary. - For our own good!!!

6 Genesis 創世記3:4-6 4蛇對女人說：「你們決不會死；5因為　神知道你們吃那果子的時候，你們的眼睛就開了；你們會像　神一樣，能知道善惡。」 6於是，女人見那棵樹的果子好作食物，又悅人的眼目，而且討人喜愛，能使人有智慧，就摘下果子來吃了；又給了和她在一起的丈夫，他也吃了。 4 The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! 5 For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate.

7 Large Boundary with A LOT of Freedom
Relationship: Oppressive in nature  Suppressive or Disobedient 壓制 壓抑 叛逆

8 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 青春期 Teenager : It’s not a period of disobedience叛逆期 It’s a period of reaping 收成期 -- reap what you have been sowing for the past 15 yrs.

9 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 2. It is different than Teacher-Student 不是師生關係 Student: Transfer of Knowledge 知識傳授 Disciple: Passing on of life 生命傳承

10 Grading the Parents 1.父母彼此間和睦相處，互敬互愛，從不在我面前使用不 文明語言或無休止地爭吵。 Parents are in harmony, respect each other, their arguments are reasonable. 2.父母能為我創造良好的學習環境，不以電視，電腦或大 聲說話來影響我的學習。Parents create a good learning environment for me. They do not distract me with watching TV, using computer, or speaking loudly. 3.父母能積極學習，不斷進取. Parents are constantly learning and reading too. 4.父母能經常與我溝通，耐心地傾聽我的訴說，從不態度 惡劣地打斷我。Parents communicate with me constantly, have patience when listening to me, do not disrupt me when I’m speaking.    

11 5.父母能關心我的身心健康，膳食平衡，視力保護和生理 健康，帶領我積極鍛煉身體。Parents care about my holistic health, my balance diet, my eye sight, etc. Parents exercise with me. 6.父母每月都給我零花錢，但會指導我合理使用，讓我學 會勤儉節約。Parents give me monthly allowance, but teach me how to manage it. 7.父母從不溺愛我，每天都耐心指導我做力所能及的家務， 培養我的獨立能力。Parents never spoil me. Give me chores to do and train me to be independent. 8.父母能正確對待我的不良生活習慣，不是強行制止，而 是和我講道理，幫助我改正, 並父母自己能做到榜樣。 Parents correct my bad habits not by simply stopping it, instead they will explain to me, set good examples themselves.

12 耶穌叫了十二個門徒來，給他們權柄，能趕逐污鬼，並醫治各樣的病症…
Matthew 馬太福音 10:1 耶穌叫了十二個門徒來，給他們權柄，能趕逐污鬼，並醫治各樣的病症… Jesus summoned His twelve disciples and gave them authority over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal every kind of disease and every kind of sickness… showed them how to do it and empowered them to actually do it! 示範給他們看，並給他們權柄實際去操作

13 TTS Test Test See (Try Me!!!)
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14 Ephesians 以弗所書 5:20-21 I Peter 彼得前書 2:17 17 務要尊敬眾人，親愛教中的弟兄，敬畏 神， 尊敬君王。
20 凡事要奉我們主耶穌基督的名常常感謝父　神。 21 又當存敬畏基督的心，彼此順服。 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I Peter 彼得前書 2:17 17 務要尊敬眾人，親愛教中的弟兄，敬畏　神， 尊敬君王。 17 Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.

15 Ephesians 以弗所書 5:20-21 I Peter 彼得前書 2:17 17 務要尊敬眾人，親愛教中的弟兄，敬畏 神， 尊敬君王。
20 凡事要奉我們主耶穌基督的名常常感謝父　神。 21 又當存敬畏基督的心，彼此順服。 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I Peter 彼得前書 2:17 17 務要尊敬眾人，親愛教中的弟兄，敬畏　神， 尊敬君王。 17 Show proper respect to (honor, value尊榮) everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.

16 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 2. It is different than Teacher-Student 不是師生關係

17 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 2. It is different than Teacher-Student 不是師生關係 3. There is Discipline in Discipleship 有管教的部分

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19 Exodus 出埃及記 14:11-12 11 他們對摩西說：「難道在埃及沒有墳地，你把我們帶來死在曠野嗎？你為甚麼這樣待我們，將我們從埃及領出來呢？ 12 我們在埃及豈沒有對你說過，不要攪擾我們，容我們服事埃及人嗎？因為服事埃及人比死在曠野還好。」 11 Then they said to Moses, “Is it because there were no graves in Egypt that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? Why have you dealt with us in this way, bringing us out of Egypt? 12 Is this not the word that we spoke to you in Egypt, saying, ‘Leave us alone that we may serve the Egyptians’? For it would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness.”

20 Discipleship in Parenting
1. It has to be Voluntary 自願的 2. It is different than Teacher-Student 不是師生關係 3. There is Discipline in Discipleship 有管教的部分 Don’t Spoil Your Children 不要過度寵小孩 Let Your Children Work for It 讓他們付出 Balance it with Disciplinary Action 體罰與管教

21 箴言Proverbs 3:12 因為耶和華所愛的，他必責備， 正如父親責備所喜愛的兒子。 For whom the Lord loves He reproves, Even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights. 箴言Proverbs 13:14 不忍用杖打兒子的，是恨惡他； 疼愛兒子的，隨時管教。 The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life, To turn aside from the snares of death.

22 箴言Proverbs 29:15 & 17 杖打和責備能加增智慧；放縱的兒子使母親羞愧。 管教你的兒子，他就使你得安息， 也必使你心裡喜樂。 The rod and reproof give wisdom, But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother. Correct your son, and he will give you comfort; He will also delight your soul.

23 Guidelines for Physical Punishment
Make it Clear in Advance: What warrants Physical Punishment 事先申明清楚：哪些行為會有體罰 2. Use your hand or always a designated object 3. Make it Clear Afterwards: the Reason & Reaffirming with Love Pix taken from:

24 The END

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26 Ephesians 以弗所書 6:4 你們作父親的，不要惹兒女的氣， 只要照著主的教訓和警戒養育他們。 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

27 Genesis 創世記 3:9-11 9耶和華　神呼喚那人，對他說：「你在哪裡？」 10他回答：「我在園中聽見你的聲音，就害怕；因為我赤身露體，就藏了起來。」 11耶和華　神說：「誰告訴你，你是赤身露體呢？難道你吃了我吩咐你不可吃的那樹上的果子嗎？」 9 But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” 10 He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” 11 And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?”

28 Genesis 3: 蛇對女人說:「你們決不會死 ; 5因為　神知道你們吃那果子的時候，你們的眼睛就開了；你們會像 神一樣，能知道善惡。」 6於是，女人見那棵樹的果子好作食物，又悅人的眼目，而且討人喜愛，能使人有智慧（給人有智慧的慾望），就摘下果子來吃了… 4 The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! 5 For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate… Pix taken from:

29 不是得到判斷善惡的能力 Did not get the Ability to Discern Right vs. Wrong
而是要自己來分別善惡的「意願」 或說「慾望」而已 But merely the Desire to Discern Right vs. Wrong based on our own standards

30 James 雅各 Ch.3 1我的弟兄們，你們不應該有太多人作教師，因為知道我們作教師的將受更嚴厲的審判。 2 我們在許多的事上都有過錯，假如有人在言語上沒有過錯，他就是完全的人，也能夠控制全身。 3 我們若把嚼環扣入馬嘴，使牠們馴服，就能駕馭牠們的全身。 4 試看，船隻雖然甚大，又被狂風催逼，舵手只用小小的舵，就可以隨意操縱。 1Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. 2 We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. 3 When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. 4 Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go.

31 Anger / Be Angry ≠ Sin Ephesians以弗所書4:26 生氣卻不要犯罪；不可含怒到日落， 也不可給魔鬼留地步。
BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity (or a place). 詩 Psalm 37:8 你要抑制怒氣，消除烈怒； 不要心懷不平，那只會導致你作惡。 Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. Anger / Be Angry ≠ Sin

32 Colossians 歌羅西書 3:8 但現在你們要棄絕這一切的事，以及惱恨、忿怒、惡毒(或譯陰毒)、毀謗，並口中污穢的言語. But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth.

33 God is Holy / Righteous 聖潔、公義, God is Love 愛

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