摸底考试读写任务讲评 虢宇 二师附中

摸底考试 5 班情况分析： 正文最高分： 17 分 15 分 < 9 人 12 分 =<28 人 < 15 分； 10 分 =<10 人 <12 分 6 班情况分析： 正文最高分： 16 分 15 分 < 8 人 12 分 =<28 人 < 15 分； 10 分 =<7 人 <12 分 追求：正文 15 分

学习目标： 1. 提高审题能力，能抓住文章的关键词，领 会文章主题。 2. 能够围绕主题，加强段落间的篇章连贯性。 3. 能够在规定时间内，完成一个短篇习作。

高考评分标准 赋分评分标准 包含题目所给全部或绝大部分的内容要点。 主题明确，内容丰富。 词汇丰富、用词得当。能有效运用合适的 语言结构，而且没有（或极少）语法错 误。 篇章结构的连贯性较好。

Task 1 ：写出高考任务写作正文的评分标 准 :____________ 、 ___________ 、 ___________ 、 ___________ 、 ________________. 主题明确词汇丰富 用词得当 没有（或极少）语法错误 连贯性

What’s it all about? One Small Deed is a website which enables people to let the world know the good deeds they have done and to inspire others to do the same. Who are we? We are not a big organization, but just a group of people who wanted to find a way to make the world a nicer place. We live in London and come from different countries, cultures and walks of life, but the one thing we have in common is the fact that we are kind and giving people who want to see more people like us out there. Want to get involved? All you need to do is just a small good deed as often as you can. If you want to inspire others, then post your deeds on our website. Some tips for you to get started: Open the door for someone. Offer your seat on the train or bus for someone who needs it more than you. If a colleague asks for your help at work and you are really busy, find a way. If someone is in need, like a man in a wheelchair struggling to get across the street, help them. If you see someone crying, don’t ignore them, ask if you can help. Task 2 ： 圈划出阅读材料中的关键 词，比较习作

阅读材料： What’s it all about? One Small Deed is a website which enables people to let the world know the good deeds they have done and to inspire others to do the same. Who are we? We are not a big organization, but just a group of people who wanted to find a way to make the world a nicer place. We live in London and come from different countries, cultures and walks of life, but the one thing we have in common is the fact that we are kind and giving people who want to see more people like us out there. 写作内容 2 （ 1 ）你如何看待他们的行为 习作 A. Those “OneSmallDeed”s member are making good use of the Website to do the good deed, they send the message which is full of love to the world and try their best to make the earth a better place to live in. I am so delighted from the bottom of my heart. 习作 B. In my opinion, it is a positive way to understand something good nearby us, adjust our emission to have an optimistic attitude towards life. I approve their behavior. tip 1. ____________________________________ 紧扣阅读材料中的关键词

篇章对比：习作 A ． When I finished reading that introduction, I was so moved by their behaviors. There is no doubt that they really give hands to people who are in need by doing small deed. I think this voluntary work obviously shows our Chinese traditional virtue. In our modern life, doing a small good deed plays a significant role. It reminds me of my friend named Janet. Janet is a generous and warm-hearted girl who are willing to help people. One year ago, I went shopping with her in the street. When we were about to go back home, we found that a small girl was crying. Without hesitation, Janet asked the girl what happened to her. Knowing the small girl lost in her way, Janet calmed her down by giving some sweets to her and asked me to go to the police with her. After having waited in the police for three hours, we finally helped the girl find her mother. Her mother constantly thanked to Janet and me. She even asked our address. Surprisingly, we both received lots of flowers which come from her mother in the next day. At that moment, I learned that was important for us to do a small deed in our life. As for my intention, I will pay attention to the surroundings. When I see the old in the bus or underground, I will offer seat for them. When I see someone in need who get across the street, I will help them to the safe place.

习作 B It is a special way for us to help others. Not only does it spread your good deeds but also, it will make communication convenient. This behavior explains the meaning of “I help you, everyone will help me.” I should give my appreciation from the bottom of my heart. As for me, good deeds bring large effect. If you pick up the rubbish which you or others have thrown carelessly, it can show your responsibility of keeping public places clean. Besides, it makes the road more comfortable to walk and it helps the cleaners. No matter what small deeds you did, it will make a different result. To do good deeds can’t hang on the mouth, so I will do it in my daily work. I want to form a good habit with all the chances. I will keep my warm heart and kind to help others.

Task 3: 技巧点拨 Tip1 写段落： ______________________________ Tip2 谋篇章 : ___________________________________ ________________________________ 重现、复现关键词，加强段落内容之间 的深度连贯性 紧扣阅读材料中的关键词

Task 4 巩固提升 2014 （广东） Oseola McCarty spent more than 75 years washing and ironing other people’s clothes. As a laundrywoman, she was only paid only a few dollars each time. Certainly nobody would consider her rich, so they were all amazed when Miss McCarty decided to donate $150,000 to the University of Southern Mississippi. The money was in fact her life savings. She could save such a large amount of money because she lived a very simple life. She never learned to drive, and when she wanted to go somewhere, she just walked. She never flew to anywhere till the donation （捐助）, and in the 50 years she had been out of the South only once. The house in which she lived was also a rather modest one her last uncle left her. Only after she became known in America did she begin to travel all over the country. Since then, she had been the subject of many interviews and articles and was even invited to the White House. Her donation was for the students who clearly needed financial help. She herself left school in the sixth grade and had never married or had children. She said to the reporters that the idea of helping somebody’s child go to college gave her much pleasure.

[ 写作内容 ] 1. 以约 30 个词概括上文的主要内容 2. 以约 120 个词就 Miss McCarty 的捐助谈谈你的想法，内容包括： （ 1 ）你如何看待她的捐助行为； （ 2 ）你认为她的捐助对受惠学生有哪些影响； （ 3 ）如果你自己要捐助，你会选择哪个群体并陈述理由。 [ 评分标准 ] ：概括准确，语言规范，内容合适，语篇连贯 Tips: 圈划关键词，联系近义词和反义词，谋篇 布局。

学习细目表： 1. 提高了审题能力，能够 抓住主题 2. 每段观点明确 3. 段落间的篇章连贯性加 强 4. 能在规定时间内完成一 个篇章联系 课后活动

Homework 改： 广东（ 2014 ） 写：广东（ 2013 ）二轮专项 P31 课后活动