应用文写作-投诉信 江苏省扬中中等专业学校 董美玲

近几年高考书面表达回顾 时间 体裁（内容） 字数 2015年 应用文（通知）Notice 不少于80字 2014年 应用文（书信类）Ask for advice 80-100字 2013年 应用文（海报）Poster 2012年 记叙文（春节）Spring Festival 2011年 应用文（演讲稿）Speech 2010年 应用文（求职信）Application letter

Learning Aims 1. To know a letter of complaint consists of four parts 2. To know how to write each part of a letter of complaint 3. To know how to write a good letter of complaint using proper conjunctions (连词）

2015镇江一模书面表达试题： 汤姆几天前在一家商店购得一台电视机，但是当他回家打开电视发现电视不能正常播放，遂与营业员交涉。但该营业员对他态度粗暴，不予受理，汤姆为此向经理写一封投诉信，希望他能调查此事并回复。(字数100字左右）

What do you think of the composition? 学生例文（Sample) Dear sir: I'm very sorry to write this letter about complain your assistant. Several days ago, I bought a TV from your sales. When I stay at home.I opened the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and ask for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me for help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason. I'm looking forward to receiving your reply! My e-mail address is Tom@.com. Tom

要点全 词汇,句型 （高级）和语法多样化（较复杂） 连接词 错误少 第五档(很好，17—20分) 对口单招高考英语书面表达评分标准  第五档(很好，17—20分) 完全完成了试题规定的任务。覆盖所有知识和信息要点；语法结构 和词汇有很少的错误；具备较强的语言运用能力；有效地使用了语 句间的连接成分，能完整地表达了意义；完全达到了预期的写作目的。 第四档(好，13—16分) 比较全面地完成了试题规定的任务。虽漏掉一、两个次重点信息，但 覆盖了所有的主要内容；语法结构和词汇方面应用基本准确；有少量 错误但是不影响篇局和整体意义；比较完整表达意义；达到了预期写 作目的。 第三档(适当，9—12分) 基本完成了试题规定的任务。虽漏掉一些内容，但能表达主要内容； 应用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的要求；有一些语法和词汇方面的 错误；整体而言，尚能达到预期的写作目的。 第二档(较差，5—8分) 未恰当完成试题规定的任务。漏掉或未描述清楚一些主要内容；写了 一些无关的内容；较多语法结构和词汇方面的错误，影响了读者对写 作内容的理解；信息未能清楚地传达给读者。 词汇,句型 （高级）和语法多样化（较复杂） 连接词 错误少

How to write a letter of complaint? Part I ---Background(describe the situation) Part II---State the problems Part III---State your suggested solutions Part Ⅳ---Closing:State that you look forward to hearing from soon and that you appreciate their help.

The salutation（称呼） 分三至四段，层次清晰 Dear sir, I'm very sorry to write this letter about complain your assistant. Several days ago, I bought a TV from your sales. When I stay at home.I opened the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and ask for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me for help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason. I'm looking forward to receiving your reply! My e-mail address is Tom@.com. The signature(签名） Yours sincerely, Tom

Part I ---Background(describe the situation) Dear sir, I'm very sorry to write this letter about complain your assistant. I’m very sorry to write this letter to complain against one of your assistants 其他表达方式 I am writing to complain about your poor service /product--- I feel bad to trouble you but I'm afraid that I have to make a complaint about--- Much to my regret, I am writing to place a complaint against ---

修改一：要点是否全？ Part II---State the problems 在商店买了一台电视机 Several days ago, I bought a TV from your sales. When I stay at home.I opened the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and ask for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me for help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason. Several days ago, I bought a TV from your sales. When I stay at home.I opened the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and ask for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me for help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason. 打开电视机，不能正常播放 2015镇江一模书面表达试题： 汤姆几天前在一家商店购得一台电视机，但是当他回家打开电视发现电视不能正常播放，遂与营业员交涉。但该营业员对他态度粗暴，不予受理，汤姆为此向经理写一封投诉信，希望他能调查此事并回复。(字数100字左右） 态度粗暴，不予受理 与营业员交涉

Part II---State the problems 修改二：语法、词汇有错误吗？ Part II---State the problems 注意词汇及固定搭配，时态要统一 Several days ago, I bought a TV from your sales. When I stay at home.I opened the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and ask for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me for help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason. stayed shop turned on asked \ an explanation

修改三：增加适当连接词 Part II---State the problems Several days ago, I bought a TV from your shop. When I stayed at home,I turned on the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and asked for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me any help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason.

修改三：增加连接词 Part II---State the problems 1. 表增加的连接词： and then, in addition, furthermore, moreover, again, another, first, second 2. 表时间顺序的连接词： afterwards, earlier, later, immediately, soon, next, suddenly, finally 3. 表空间顺序的连接词： near (to), far (from), in front of, behind, beside, beyond 4. 表比较的连接词： in the same way, just like, just as 5. 表对照的连接词： but, still, however, on the other hand, on the contrary, in spite of, even though

修改三：增加连接词 Part II---State the problems 6. 表结果和原因： because, since, as a result, therefore, thus, hopefully, otherwise 7. 表目的的连接词：for this reason, for this purpose, so that 8。 表强调的连接词： in fact, in deed, surely, necessarily, certainly, without any doubt, truly, above all, the most important of all, 9. 表解释说明的连接词： for example, in this case, for instance 10. 表总结的连接词： finally, at last, in conclusion, as I have shown, in other words, in brief, as has been stated above

修改三：增加连接词 Part II---State the problems Several days ago, I bought a TV from your shop. But when I brought it home and turned it on,I found it couldn't be used/it didn't work properly. So I took it back to the shop and told the assistant what had happened. To my surprise, your assistant didn't help me solve the problem. On the contrary, he shouted at me rudely and refused to examine it. Several days ago, I bought a TV from your shop. When I stayed at home,I turned on the TV. The TV couldn't be used.I came back and asked for your assistant. He was very impatient.He didn't give me any help. I felt very angry. I hope that you can give me a reason.

Part III---State your suggested solutions I'd like a full refund. I would like to replace it with a new one. I do wish that my problem can be dealt with immediately. Under these circumstances, I'm quite disappointed with--- I appreciate it very much if you could--- We require you look into this matter and have the shop assistant apologize to us.

可适当扩充 Para Ⅳ---Closing I'm looking forward to receiving your reply! My e-mail address is Tom@.com. 可适当扩充 Thank you for your consideration and I'm looking forward to your reply. I look forward to hearing from you and a solution of this problem. Please contact me at the above address or by phone---

Sum-up Part I ---Background(describe the situation) Part II---State the problems Part III---State your suggested solutions Part Ⅳ---Closing:State that you look forward to hearing from soon and that you appreciate their help.

试一试 假如你是John Ding，2013年11月7日你在Lotte Mart 花200元钱买了一盒蛋糕给你母亲作为生日礼物。回家后，你母亲非常高兴，立刻打开蛋糕尝了尝，发现已变质。请写一封投诉信给Lotte Mart，内容要点如下： 1.介绍情况。 2.要求退货(ask for a refund)或换货(exchange)。 3.期待答复。 注意：词数为80-100。

书面表达评价表 项目 自评 他评 1.书写工整吗？有没有乱涂乱划? 2.句子开头注意大小写了吗? 3.有没有注意标点符号? 4将文章分段了吗?分成了几段? 5有单词拼写错误吗?几个? 6.有时态错误吗?误用了哪种时态? 7.注意主谓一致了吗? 8.有没有语态的错误? 9.有没有使用关联词?使用得当吗? 10.有没有词性的错误?哪一种? 11.简单句表达正确吗? 12.是否注意使用了复杂的句子结构? 13.表达方式是否多样化?注意长短句搭配了吗? 14.有没有用好词好句?用了哪些?

试一试 Dear Sir/ Madam, On November 7, 2013 I bought a box of cake in your Lotte Mart for 200 yuan as my mother’s birthday gift. I am afraid I must complain about the product. Mum saw the cake and was very happy after I brought it home. After Mum opened and tried it, she was surprised to find it had gone bad. I was very angry because it was my mum’s birthday gift. So I would like to ask for a refund or at least exchanging a fresh one. I believe you will deal with it at once.I am looking forward to your answer. Yours faithfully, John Ding

Homework 1.Review the four parts of a letter of complaint 2.Write a letter of complaint according to the following situation. 假如你是李华，你购买了一部某外国公司生产的手机。因为质量问题，向该公司投诉。 要点：1. 问题：手机不响铃，不能发短信；该产品已卖完，无法更换；型号新，无配件，无法维修。2. 要求：公司应尽快予以更换。3. 字数：100字左右（配件：spare part)